


The Imbecile Night Guard

by Coffee Obsessed Fiend (Fanschaotictrash)



Category: Five Nights at Freddy's
Genre: Comedy, Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, Funny, Horror, Late at Night, Lols, One Shot, Other, Pizza, Random & Short, Randomness, Short One Shot, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-13 22:07:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29658015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fanschaotictrash/pseuds/Coffee%20Obsessed%20Fiend
Summary: Just a little goofy Five Nights at Freddy's thing that came to mind one day. Nothing serious but it was fun to write and is hopefully fun to read!
Kudos: 4





	The Imbecile Night Guard

“But hey, before you die, do you want to take this completely important survey? We promise it’ll be worth your time!” the animatronic bear said, its jaw moving up and down slowly, creating a disturbing grinding sound. The night guard, wanting to stall for time, swallowed and nodded.

“Um...sure,” he agreed hesitantly.

“Great! So, how have you been liking Freddy’s? Has the pizza been to your satisfaction?” the bear asked, pulling out a piece of paper. The night guard stared in astonishment.

“Well, I’m just the night guard, I don’t really eat the pizzas,” the man admitted, scratching the back of his head as a cold sweat fell down his face. The bear stared for a moment, no expression on his face, before suddenly pulling out a slice of pizza.

“Here, try this.” The night guard was unsure, imagining that pizza was incredibly old, though, not wanting to anger him, he took a hesitant bite.

“Um, well, it’s sorta stale, and the crust is oddly thin here...the sauce could use some work too, overall it’s a little disappointing,” the night guard said honestly, perhaps as a way to get to his insane employers before death. The bear wrote this down, nodding.

“Mm-hmm, mm-hmm,” the bear confirmed before looking up, noting the man’s name tag. “So, why did you start to work at Freddy’s, Bobby?” The night guard flinched slightly at the use of his name.

“Well, I needed the money and this was the only job I could land, so...” he admitted, blushing in slight embarrassment. 

“Couldn’t you just work at another fast food joint?” the bear pointed out.

“Um, a while back I kind of had an incident with some oil at the fries station, and well...” he began carefully, trailing off as he hid behind his cap.

“Bobby...are you telling me you **burned** someone?” the animatronic asked, almost seeming shocked.

“Y-yeah. They were my boss and they, er, fired me of course.” He laughed nervously.

“Well Bobby, you fit this place just perfectly!” the bear exclaimed.

“Gee, thanks...”


End file.
